The best thing about Alzheimer's Disease is that you get to meet so many new people.
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During the Iraq War, As a soldier was saying good-bye to his family, his five-year-old son, James, held his leg and started pleading not to leave.
"No, Daddy, please don't go!" he kept repeating.
They were beginning to make a scene when his wife, desperate to calm him, said, "Let Daddy go and I'll take you to get a pizza." Immediately, James loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said, "'Bye, Daddy."
Chuck Norris is the only person who could truly judge a book by its' cover.
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What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A blowjob with handlebars.
When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor.
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A Lalu brought a simple, spendthrift wife from a small town in Bihar.
He convinced her that they should go for Honeymoon.
The wife would not understand complex term as honeymoon and kept asking for explanation.
Lalu said, "Let me feel you my manhood in Honeymoon and you would know."
They went.
Had lots of fun and came back.
Wife back at home asked, "I still don’t understand what is this honeymoon that we went for."
The Husband said, "Oh, we were together, had so many hugs, kisses, varieties of sex, jokes, fun all that is honeymoon."
The spendthrift wife got angry, "You should have told me that before. Back in town, Malu, Kalu, Suru and I were together all the times, and had this fun without spending a dime of my money."
Chuck Norris' primary weapon in Call of Duty is his roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
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Yo momma is so poor for Christmas she got a box, put two sticks on it, spun it and said son here's your xbox 360.
Chuck Norris can swim and skydive at the same time.
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