A man was fishing and he caught a crocodile. The crocodile told him, "Please let me go. I'll grant you any wish you desire." The man said, "Okay. I wish my balls could touch the ground." So the crocodile bit his legs off.
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
How do lesbians handle their liquor? By the ears. (Lick her)
What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous? Get back! I have no idea how big it grows!
A New Zealander walking along the road with a sheep under each arm. He meets another New Zealander who says "you sheerin' mate?" and the first guy replies "naw, they're all mine"
Nothing spreads easier than butter, except for yo mommas legs.
Q: What book do women like the most? A: "Their husbands checkbook!"
Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!
Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.
I need your help making a cream sauce.