The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Chuck Norris can travel back in time into the future.
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.
Cavemen didn't invent fire Chuck Norris mearly clicked his fingers and gave it to them.
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
The second hardest element in the universe is Chuck Norris. The first only comes into existance when Chuck gets excited.
Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
How many God-fearing, tax-paying, law-abiding men in Las Vegas does it take to light a bonfire? Both of them.