Q: What's the difference between a lesbian finger-fucking a blonde and a Schwinn at the side of the road?
A: One's a bike in a ditch, and the other's...
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Q. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?
A. She kept having affairs with men!
Q: If a blonde and a brunette were falling off a building, who would hit the ground first?
A: The brunette because the blonde would stop for directions.
How many blondes does it take to milk a cow?
Five - one to hold the udder, and four to lift and the cow up and down.
A blonde was driving down the motorway when her car phone rang.
It was her husband, urgently warning her, “Honey, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on the M25. Please be careful!”
“It’s not just one car!” said the blonde.
“There’s f*ck*ng hundreds of them!”
Lesbians can also take Viagra.
They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.
How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters?
All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
Q: What does a lesbian have in common with a mechanic?
A: Snap-on tools!
A blonde's redhead decides to show her a neat way to trick people.
You put your hand on a wall and ask someone to punch it.
But before they do, you pull your hand away!
"That is a neat trick," thinks the blonde, and tries desperately to remember it, but isn't all too successful.
Despite this, she decides to try it out on her blonde friend.
"Okay," she says, "I'm going to put my hand in front of my face..."
How do lesbians handle their liquor?
By the ears.
(Lick her)