How can you tell if your house was built by lesbian carpenters?
All tongue-in-groove, with no studs.
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What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 government employees in one room?
100 people that don''t do dick!
What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?
Fur traders.
Did you hear about the two lesbians who bought an organ so they could play hymns?
Q: What did the Lawyer say to the lesbian?
A: One slip of the tongue and you will be in s**t!
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Q: What's the difference between a lesbian finger-fucking a blonde and a Schwinn at the side of the road?
A: One's a bike in a ditch, and the other's...
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common?
A: Both take it in the rear.
Gay translation
I want a commitment.
I'm sick of masturbation.
Haven't I seen you before?
Nice ass.
I need you.
My hand is tired.
You're the only man I've ever cared about.
You are the only man who hasn't rejected me.
I'm a Romantic.
I'm poor.
I really want to get to know you better.
So I can tell my friends about it.
It's just orange juice, try it.
3 more shots, and he'll have his legs around my head.
He's kinda cute.
I want to have sex with him till my dick turns blue!
He's not my type.
He won't sleep with me.
I miss you so much
I am so horny that my dog is starting to look good.
I had a wonderful time last night.
Who the hell are you?
Do you love me?
I've done something stupid and you might find out.
Do you 'really' love me?
I've done something stupid and you're going to find out.
I'll give you a call.
I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again.
I've been thinking a lot.
You're not as attractive as when I was drunk.
I think we should just be friends.
You're ugly.
I've learned a lot from you.
Next!!!!
Q. Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?
A. They're called Dikes.
They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!
Q: Why was the lesbian sick?
A: She was lacking vitamin D.
Two gay men are walking down the street trying to bum a ride.
A truck driver picks them up.
After a while the first gay man asked in a very gay voice, "Please sir can I fart?"
The truck driver then says, "Yeah sure who cares."
So the gay guy goes "POOF".
Then the second gay man asks if he can fart. The truck driver says he doesn't care and the second gay man went ''poof''.
Then the big truck driver goes to the gay men and says, "Ok gentlemen can I fart?"
The gay men say right on and the truckdriver lets it blow.
The fart was huge and smelly and loud.
The gay men then say, "He is obviously a virgin."
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