Joke #3885

There are only two kinds of computer. The latest model, and the obsolete.
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: IT

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New Year's Resolutions for Internet Junkies... I will try to figure out why I *really* need 9 e-mail addresses. I will stop sending e-mail to my wife (husband). I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own. I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I answer my e-mail. I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person. I resolve to back up my 12GB hard drive daily...well, once a week... okay, monthly then...or maybe... I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher. When I hear "Where do you want to go today?" I will not reply "MS Tech Support." When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL... LOL!" I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it. I will think of a password other than "password." I will stop checking my e-mail at 3:00 in the morning... 4:30 is much more practical. I resolve... I resolve to... I resolve to, uh... I resolve to, uh, get my, er... I resolve to, uh, get my, er, off-line work done, too!
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What do Scientists have for snacks? Micro-chips.
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Someday, the people who know how to use computers will rule over those who don’t. And there will be a special name for them – secretaries.
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I'm not anti-social. I'm just not user friendly.
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Why should you never fart in an apple store? They don't have Windows!
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I’ve got one those special filter programmes on my Internet access. It’s really handy, it blocks out everything except porn sites.
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What kind of doctor fixes broken websites? A URLologist.
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What do computers do when they get hungry? They eat chips!
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