Chuck Norris can alphabetize m&m's
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The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
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Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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The only reason world peace doesn't exist is because Chuck Norris doesn't feel like bringing peace to the whole world.
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Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.
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Chuck Norris talks in my sleep.
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Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
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Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby.
Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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