Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
Chuck Norris is a fact.
Chuck Norris didn't have a mum or dad, he created himself.
Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ATM PIN – the machine just spits out cash – at every bank!