Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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Chuck Norris can check his pulse by same hand.
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Chuck Norris is the reason terrorists hide in caves.
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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross.
Just never his own.
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Chuck Norris can facebook through a calculator.
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Chuck Norris, not Duke, stole the recipie for Bush's Baked Beans.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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Chuck Norris made sick the healthy chocolate.
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When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
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Chuck Norris actually went to Rome by all roads. At the same time.
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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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