Armageddon is defined as the day Chuck Norris gets bored with us.
Chuck Norris is a hunter. But Chuck Norris does not hunt. That implies the possibility of failure.
Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
Lays chips claims "No one can eat just one". Wrong. Chuck Norris ate ONE, laughed then ate a whole bag of Doritos.
Rambo is simply Chuck Norris disguised as Sylvester Stalone playing tag.
Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
Chuck Norris is cooler than the other side of the pillow.