Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
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Chuck Norris only mast*rbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
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Three men go on a skiing trip, but when they get to the HOTEL they find out that the hotel have mucked up their rooms and they have to share one big bed.
When they wake up the guy on the left says I had a well strange dream last night that I was getting a hand job, and then the guy on the right goes thats strange O had the same dream I was getting a hand job.
Then the guy in the middle goes well thats strange because I had a dream I was skiing!
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
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There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris.
There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
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My mother in law is so ugly that her face is like a masturbated dick!
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