Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
Vote:
Q: Hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers?
A: It's called Sosumi.
Why are we so sure that Eve was African?
If she were white, she wouldn't have eaten that apple!
She would say, "Is this organic? What would Oprah do?"
If she had been Asian, she'd have eaten the damn snake!
Chuck Norris does not open doors.
Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
Vote:
Q: What is so ironic about Atheists?
A: They're always talking about God.
A couple has been married for many years, and one day the man tells his wife that he wishes she had bigger breasts.
"But how am I going to get bigger breasts?" she asks.
"That’s simple." he says, "Just rub your breasts with toilet paper every day."
"And that would do it?" the surprised wife wonders.
"Well," answers the husband, "it sure did work on your behind!"
What do you get when you mix a nigger and an octopus?
I don't know, but it picks the hell out of cotton
Vote:
Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out.
After examining him, the dentist said, "Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?"
"Ah sure do!" replied Cloyd. "Everee single day!"
"What do you brush with?" asked the dentist.
"Preparation H," said the redneck.
Q: What do you call a white person engulfed in flames?
A: A firecracker.
Every mobile phone user has complained like this:
Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.