Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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The Playstation Network is down because Chuck Norris unplugged his PS3.
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There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard.
There is only another fist.
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Chuck Norris can fall up.
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Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked the turbines of Hoover Dam.
Since then, the Colorado River is a tourist attraction.
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.
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Chuck Norris actually completed Tetris.
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Chuck Norris can break his opponents serve with an ace.
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Chuck Norris once dropped a glass vase onto the floor.
The glass apologized for breaking in his presence.
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Chuck Norris tried juggling once... and now we have our solar system.
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