They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
Chuck Norris was the image used for Papa Smurf.
Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink. If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
It takes courage to say YES at the altar. It takes even more courage to say NO to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can travel through time by running 88 miles per hour.