Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesnt walk, the earth moves under his feet.
Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver pawn shop in Las Vegas. They made a deal. Chuck now owns the shop.
Chuck Norris is the only person to really have "Birthdays". The rest of us have "Thank you Chuck for allowing me to live another year- days".
The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris. It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.