Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks. They fold under pressure.
Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
Chuck Norris drew a triangle with four sides.
Chuck Norris once kicked Hulk in the face, so Hulk ran into the woods. He is now known as Shrek.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Chuck Norris can beat everyone. Except for 1 person. Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once cried just to see what it was like. The end result was the creation of life.