Chuck Norris can cash two party, out of state checks with no ID, or else!
Chuck Norris kicked the world once, it hasn't stopped spinning.
Chuck Norris can travel a negative distance.
Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
Chuck Norris can walk on water..,he's not God...the water is just afraid of getting him wet.
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
Water holds its breath when Chuck Norris is in below the surface.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.