Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT. He got a perfect score.
Arnold Schwarzenegger always says he'll be back. But Chuck Norris always handles things the first time
Revenge is a dish best served...by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs. They come on when HE wants them to.
Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
Global warming is caused by transient energy leftover from Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks.
Chuck Norris brings the noise AND the funk.
Avatar's were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a smurf.