For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one
Chuck Norris once created a time machine and had to fight himself. We call it The Big Bang.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Chuck Norris.
When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once lapped his opponent...in a drag race.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.