One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart. The clerk told him to have a nice day. The next day the clerk was found dead. The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why. He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris did 5 successful suicide bomb missions
The Holy Grail is in Chuck Norris's living room.
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
Scientists did not in fact slipt the atom, Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicked it.
How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia? 2 months... How does he get there? He walks.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
The only difference between nunchucks and the legs of Chuck Norris is that wood eventually breaks.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.