Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
Ckuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet...he scares the shit out of it.
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard. They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.
When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face. We now have questions.
Chuck Norris doesn't sweat. He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.