It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
Barbwire wants a tatoo of Chuck Norris.
With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.