Q: What did the baby owl's parents say when he wanted to go to a party? A: "You're not owld enough."
What happens when you kiss a canary? You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
One day a teacher asked the class, "What is the difference between a bird and a fly?" A student then replied, "A bird can fly but a fly cannot bird."
Q: What's a polygon? A: A dead parrot.
A man is driving happily along when he is pulled over by the police. The copper approaches him and politely asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?" "Why?" snorts the man. "Is there a fat bird in my car?"
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were having a conversation one fine Sunday evening. One remarked to the other, ‘I got a new hearing device and it works fine?' The second said, ‘oh yes, my grandchildren just love the gifts of my choice.' The third one who noticed the hearing device in the ear of the first one asked, what kind is it?' The one with the brand new hearing device answered ‘about 6 O'clock'. All three of them looked up in the birds in the sky and said, "Birds of the same feather ‘flock' together."