The best history jokes

The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
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has 83.87 % from 390 votes. More jokes about: computer, history, IT, technology
In class one day, Mr. Johnson pulled Johnny over to his desk after a test, and said, "Johnny I have a feeling that you have been cheating on your tests." Johnny was astounded and asked Mr. Johnson to prove it. "Well, said Mr. Johnson, I was looking over your test and the question was, 'Who was our first president?', and the little girl that sits next to you, Mary, put 'George Washington,' and so did you." "So, everyone knows that he was the first president." "Well, just wait a minute," said Mr. Johnson. "The next question was, 'Who freed the slaves?' Mary put Abraham Lincoln and so did you." "Well, I read the history book last night and I remembered that," said Johnny. "Wait, wait," said Mr. Johnson. "The next question was, 'Who was president during the Louisiana Purchase?' Mary put 'I don't know,' and you put, 'Me neither'."
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has 83.78 % from 901 votes. More jokes about: history, political, school, student, teacher
Who's the biggest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
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has 80.18 % from 470 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty, game, history
To finally solve whether Mona-Lisa is smiling or not, Chuck Norris took a quick look at it. She's crying
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has 78.78 % from 540 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, history
Elderly Man: "Father, during the war I allowed a Jewish refugee to live in my attic." Priest: "I do not see anything wrong with that. You helped a poor soul survive the war." Elderly Man: "I collected rent from him for every month that he stayed." Priest: "That's not a good thing you did, but it was for a good cause. You helped him survive." Elderly Man: "Should I tell him the war is over?"
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has 77.87 % from 217 votes. More jokes about: history, jewish, old people, priest, war
Nate: Why was school easier for cave people? Kate: Why? Nate: Because there was no history to study!
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has 73.36 % from 331 votes. More jokes about: history, school
Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
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has 69.52 % from 740 votes. More jokes about: black humor, history, Hitler, jewish
Q: What was the world's first palindrome? A: Madam, I'm Adam.
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: bible, communication, history
The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college president, "you already make more than the entire History department." "Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look." He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered. Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath. "You're not there, sir," he reported. "Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the president, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: history, sport
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain." His wife asked, "How do you know?" "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
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has 62.74 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: history
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