The best tax jokes

A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA, they decided to send it to President Clinton. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill, as this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00, and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord. It said: Dear Lord, Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and as usual, those jerks deducted $95.
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has 85.07 % from 714 votes. More jokes about: god, money, political, tax
A woman walks into her accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, “Before we begin, I’ll need to ask a few questions.” He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, “What is your occupation?” The woman replies, “I’m a whore.” The accountant balks and says, “No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let’s try to rephrase that.” The woman, “Ok, I’m a prostitute.” “No, that is still too crude. Try again.” They both think for a minute, then the woman states, “I’m a chicken farmer.” The accountant asks, “What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?” “Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year.”
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has 81.76 % from 559 votes. More jokes about: accountant, dirty, tax, women
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
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has 81.22 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, tax, work
Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.
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has 78.75 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: death, political, tax, time
How many God-fearing, tax-paying, law-abiding men in Las Vegas does it take to light a bonfire? Both of them.
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has 75.77 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: god, lawyer, men, tax
Accountant after reading a nursery rhyme to his child,"No, son. It wouldn't be tax deductible when Little Bo Peep loses her sheep. But I like your thinking."
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has 73.22 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: accountant, animal, kids, tax
Q: How do you know you've got a good tax accountant? A: He's had a loophole named after him.
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has 68.56 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, tax
A Senator in the USA was once asked about his attitude toward whisky. "If you mean the demon drink that poisons the mind, pollutes the body, desecrates family life, and inflames sinners, then I'm against it. But if you mean the elixir of a New Year toast, the shield against winter chill, the taxable potion that puts needed funds into public coffers to comfort little crippled children, then I'm for it. This is my position, and I will not compromise."
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has 68.00 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, money, new year, political, tax
Where do homeless accountants live? In a tax shelter.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: accountant, life, money, tax
Q: Who makes the best detective - Sherlock Holmes or a tax accountant? A: The tax accountant - she make's more deductions.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: accountant, tax, work
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