Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
Chuck Norris broke the law once. It still isn’t fixed.
Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund