The best hipster jokes

A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you." The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you." The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says. The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun. After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! " The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
has 80.41 % from 3893 votes. More jokes about: god, hipster, sex
Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway? A: Because its underground.
has 79.96 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: hipster, travel
Hipsters hate rivers. Too mainstream.
has 77.51 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: hipster
Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: Because he ate his food before it was cool.
has 77.50 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: food, hipster
Q: How did the wanna-be-hipster die? A: Trying to cross the mainstream!
has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: death, hipster
Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary? A: Because the river was too mainstream.
has 73.52 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: hipster
Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.
has 71.43 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: hipster, light bulb
Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion? A: It was too current.
has 70.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: hipster, time
Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters? A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork
has 68.45 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: hipster, life, work
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: hipster, music
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