Roses are red violets are blue, I have never tried So can I stick it up you?
Chuck Norris watched the tape from The Ring. His phone rang and when he answered a scared voice said "Excuse me, the wrong number"
Q: Why do C# programmers have trouble dating women? A: They want women with class, but they treat them like objects.
Q: What did Jesus tell the Mexicans just before he died? A: Act stupid until I get back.
Q: What is the first symptom of AIDS? A: A sharp pain in the ass.
Camilla goes to the doctors and says "Doctor, whenever one sucks Charlie's cock one gets a stomach ache." The doctor says "Have you tried Andrew's?"
Q: How does Jesus celebrate Easter? A: He gets a manicure, pedicure, and has his nails polished.
An elderly black man goes to see his doctor for help with his sexual performance issues. The doctor explains that Viagra isn't going to work this time. The man goes back to the doctor a month later for a follow-up. This time he is wearing a new tuxedo, shined shoes, and a top-hat. The doctor is impressed and asks what the occasion is. The old man says, "If I'm gonna be impotent I'm gonna look impotent!"
A redneck family shares one vehicle, the daughter asks her dad for the truck. The father says "okay, you know what to do." Then continues to lower his pants, the daughter says "daddy why's there shit on your dick." The father then replies "ohhhh, that's right honey, your brother has the truck."
I asked my wife why did she marry me. Wife: "Because you are funny." Me: "I thought it was beacause I was good in bed?" Wife: "You see? You're hilarious."
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