New jokes

Wife: I'm leaving you. Me: Is it because I act like I know everything? Wife: Yes. Me: I knew it.
has 82.03 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: divorce, wife
Wife: "Honey let's play a game?" Husband: "Ok, what is the game all about?" Wife: "If I mention a country, you will run to the left side of the room and touch the wall. And if I mention a bird you will run to the right side of the room and touch the wall. If you run to the wrong direction, you will give me all your salary for the month." Husband: "Ok and if you fail, I will have your salary too right?" Wife: (smile) "Yes darling." Husband: "Ok" (stood up and was ready to run to any direction) Wife: "Are u ready?" Husband: "Yes, ready." Wife: "Turkey" It has been 4 hours now the husband is still standing at the spot wondering if she meant the country or the bird.
has 63.82 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, money, wife
Waiter: "How do you like your steak, sir?" Sir: "Like winning an argument with my wife." Waiter: "Rare it is."
has 70.92 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage
I threw a ball for my dog... It's a bit extravagant I know, but it was his birthday and he looks great in a dinner jacket.
has 50.68 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: animal, birthday, dog, food
Teacher: Why are you crawling into class, John? Littly Johny: You said, "Don't anyone dare walk into my class late!"
has 71.05 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
A: What does "IDK" mean? B: I don't know. A: Ugh! Nobody does!
has 58.00 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: life
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain." His wife asked, "How do you know?" "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
has 54.80 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: history
Two chess players were in a hotel lobby, bragging to each other about their recent victories. The manager comes over, "Could you go to your rooms now, please?" "Why?!" "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
has 50.97 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: game
I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her fitness trainer. Me: "Okay, this isn't working out."
has 76.20 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: love, sex, sport
My wife beamed at me with pride and said, "Wow! I never thought our son would go that far!" I said, "This trebuchet is amazing! Go get our daughter."
has 61.50 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: black humor, kids, wife

What about the funniest jokes?
Have fun with our best jokes, rated by visitors.

More jokes →
Page 1 of 10.