The best viagra jokes

A man went to the doctor’s office to get a double dose of Viagra. The doctor told him that he couldn’t allow him a double dose. “Why not?” asked the man. “Because it’s not safe,” replied the doctor. “But I need it really bad,” said the man. “Well, why do you need it so badly?” asked the doctor. The man said, “My girlfriend is coming into town on Friday; my ex-wife will be here on Saturday; and my wife is coming home on Sunday. Can’t you see? I must have a double dose.” The doctor finally relented saying, “Okay, I’ll give it to you, but you have to come in on Monday morning so that I can check you to see if there are any side effects.” On Monday, the man dragged himself in; his arm in a sling. The doctor asked, “What happened to you?” The man said, “No one showed up.”
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has 81.37 % from 174 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, drug, viagra, wife
Q: What's the difference between the first honeymoon and the second? A: First honeymoon, Niagara. Second honeymoon, Viagra.
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has 81.19 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: age, sex, travel, viagra, wedding
Bloke in hospital with 60% burns, Dr. says, "Give him two Viagra." Nurse asks, "Do you think that will help?" Dr replies, "No but it will keep the sheets off his legs!"
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has 76.41 % from 141 votes. More jokes about: dirty, hospital, medical, nurse, viagra
Q: Have you tried Starbucks new hot beverage, Viagraccino? A: One cup and you're up all night.
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has 76.11 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dirty, viagra
Q. What do Disney World & Viagra have in common? A. They both make you wait an hour for a two minute ride.
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has 75.46 % from 448 votes. More jokes about: sex, time, viagra
A parrot swallows a Viagra tablet. His owner, disgusted, puts him in the freezer to cool off. Later when he opens the freezer, he finds the parrot sweating. "How come you are sweating?" he asks. The parrot replies, "Do you know how hard it is to open the legs of a frozen chicken?"
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has 75.27 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: dirty, medical, parrot, viagra
A stranger walks up to an Egyptian man at the Cairo bazaar and offers to sell him contraband Viagra for 100 Egyptian pounds. The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "How about 20?" The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "How about 10?" The Egyptian man says, "No, not worth it." The stranger says, "Listen, these pills cost $10 each in the U.S. How can you say they're not worth it?" The Egyptian man says, "Oh, the pills are worth it my wife isn't."
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has 75.24 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, medical, money, viagra, wife
An old man goes into a pharmacy, asks for two Viagra pills and demands that the pharmacist cut them in half. The pharmacist winks at him, "OK, but do you realize they won't be as effective?" The old man says, "Listen sonny, I'm 80 years old. I don't want them for sex. I need them for getting me hard enough so I don't pee on my shoes."
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has 74.15 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: age, life, old people, sex, viagra
Did you hear about the theft at the Viagra factory? The police are looking for some hardened criminals!
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has 72.05 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty, viagra
Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers? A: They grow taller!
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: insulting, lawyer, mean, viagra
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