"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."
By tradition, fathers wear a red flower on Father's Day, if their father is alive and a white flower if he's dead. And if they have a nagging wife and a house full of screaming kids, they wear a pink flower - which means they are living but wish they were dead.
Father's Day always worried James. He was afraid that he will get a gift he can't afford.
Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday.
Happy Father's Day! I got you a present but if you want to get technical then technically you bought it. By the way, can I borrow $20?
Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem? A: Father's Day.
Happy Father's Day to a dad who was smart enough to teach me how to mow the lawn so he would't have to.
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
What is the perfect Father's Day gift? Taking your Mom away on a vacation with you.
Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.