Joke #106

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with, "A man once told me..."
Vote: has 41.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who'll predict her future: Lady, I'm sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future. Don't tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
I told my friend that she drew her eyebrows on too high. She looked surprised.
Vote: has 63.93 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
A beautiful woman enters a bar and sits next to a lawyer. "Listen honey," she says, "For $50, I’ll do absolutely anything you want." The lawyer looks around, pulls fifty dollars from his wallet and says, "Paint my house."
Vote: has 75.38 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, lawyer, money, women
An elderly woman went to her doctor, complaining about not being able to hear out of one ear. The doctor then took his penlight, looked in her ear, then took his tweezers, reached in, and pulled something out. After examining the object for a second, he exclaimed, "Well...it seems you inserted a suppository into your ear...". The old lady thought for a second, then responded "Gee...I guess that explains why I can't find my hearing-aid...!".
Vote: has 76.89 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, old people, women
What a woman says… This place is a mess! C’mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and You’ll have no clothes to wear if we don’t do laundry right now! What a man hears… blah blah blah blah blah C’MON! YOU AND I blah blah blah blah! blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, women
Q:What's the definition of mixed emotions? A:When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your brand new car.
Vote: has 56.84 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Whats six inches long, has a head on it and drives women wild ? A fifty pound note !
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" Woman: "Unfertilized."
Vote: has 69.39 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, men, sex, women
Why did the woman cross the road? That's not the point,what's she doing out of the kitchen?
Vote: has 44.74 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
How is a police car like a women? It flashes and It usually has a d*ck in it.
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cop, women