Joke #1072

Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box.
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: money

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My wife and I have a joint account. I deposit money and she withdraws it.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
Did you hear about the gypsy who won the Lottery? He got paid in travellers’ cheques.
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If I won the Lottery, I wouldn’t be one of those people who immediately quit their jobs. I’d make my boss’s life a living hell for a week or two first.
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: money
In order to help jump-start the U.S. economy, the INS has announced that this year they will stop focusing on illegal aliens, and begin the deportation of retired people. It's predicted that this will not only help lower health care entitlement costs, but it turns out that retirees are much easier to catch. Plus, they rarely can remember how to get back home.
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has 68.42 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: black humor, geography, memory, money, old people
I love her so much I worship the ground her father found oil on.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: money
An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board but only 3 parachutes. The 1st passenger said, "I am Stephen King , the best selling author of my time... My millions of fans need me , and i can't afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the planernThe 2nd passenger , Barack Hussein Obama, said , "I am the 44th President of the United States, and I am the smartest President in American history , so my people don't want me to die." He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.rnThe 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10 year old schoolboy, "My son , I am old and don't have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The little boy said , "That's okay , Your Holiness, there's a parachute left for you. America's smartest President took my schoolbag."
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has 73.36 % from 274 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, money, stupid, time
Three cheapskates try to figure out a way of killing themselves with one bullet – so they put their heads together.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: money
At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars. One of the chamber members stood up and said, "I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army."
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has 13.56 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: money
Yo mommas so poor the roaches pay the light bill!
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: money, Yo mama
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. He only brought enough money for one beer though. As hes drinking his beer, which was quite expensive, he realizes how bad he has to go to the bathroom. Not wanting anyone to drink his expensive beer, he takes out a 3x5 note card and writes on it, "I SPIT IN THIS BEER", and walks to the bathroom. When he comes back about 15 minutes later, theres another 3x5 note card next to his beer saying, "I SPIT IN IT TOO".
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, beer, money, time