Joke #11415

I like your style I like your class but most of all i like your ass.
Vote: has 67.69 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

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Man goes to a fancy dress party wearing only a glass jar on his p*nis. Lady asks, "What are you?" He says, "I'm a fireman." "But you're only wearing a glass jar," says the woman. He says, "Exactly, in an emergency, break glass." Pull knob and I'll cum as fast as I can!"
Vote: has 84.82 % from 444 votes. Send joke:

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A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. He asked her, “Do you know what I’m doing?” “Yes,” she replied, “you’re checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities.” “That is right,” said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. “Do you know what I’m doing now?” he asked. “Yes,” the woman said, “you’re checking for any lumps or breast cancer.” “Correct,” replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounts his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, “Do you know what I’m doing now?” “Yes,” she said. “You’re getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place!”
Vote: has 73.83 % from 109 votes. Send joke:

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Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
Vote: has 71.97 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food, poems, sex, time
Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm in love but not with you... When we broke up you thought I cried But all it was... Was another guy, You told your friends that I was a trick, I told mine that you had a weak dick... I said I loved you And you thought it was true, But guess what baby?! You got played too!
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
Vote: has 39.78 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

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Fly like a butterfly sting like a bee I slept with yo mama now it burns when I pee.
Vote: has 72.14 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

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What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman? "Immediately start downloading it."
Vote: has 37.92 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

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Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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One day while jogging, a man noticed two tennis balls lying by the side of the road. He picked the balls up, put them in his pocket and proceeded on his way. Waiting at the cross street for the light to change, he noticed a beautiful blonde standing next to him and smiling. "What are those big bulges in your running shorts?" she asked. "Tennis balls," answered the man, smiling back. "Wow," said the blonde, looking upset. "That must hurt. I once had tennis elbow and the pain was unbearable."
Vote: has 79.32 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

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A guy walks into a bar, orders six jägermeister shots. The bartender asks him if it's a special occation? The guy answers "yes indeed, my very first blowjob". The bartender gets excited and says "Congratulations, I'll give you the seventh shot on the house". The guy answers "Nah, if six jäger shots isn't enough to get rid of the taste, the seventh wont make much of a difference".
Vote: has 59.79 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

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