Q: What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
A: Hope it's Halloween!
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I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight.
It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Q: How do vampires get around on Halloween?
A: On blood vessels.
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake.
Sincerely, Michael Myers
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I got so fed up with trick or treaters at Halloween that in the end I turned the lights out and pretended I wasn't in.
Forget the ships.
My lighthouse, my rules...
Chuck Norris is proof that legends never die.
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Q: Where do suicide bombers go after they die?
A: Everywhere!
James Bond's license to kill was approved by Chuck Norris.
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Q: Why aren't there more famous skeletons?
A: They're a bunch of no bodies!
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Chuck Norris cleans up crime... with a mop and bucket... full of people's blood.
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