Joke #11661

Smoke a smoke Not a butt Fuck a virgin Not a slut.
Vote: has 66.64 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: poems, sex, vulgar, weed

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A guy is walking along the beach, when he sees a woman with no arms and no legs lying on the sand, crying. He walks over to her and asks what's wrong. "I've never been hugged before" she says. Thinking this is a simple enough request, the man hugs her. She soon starts crying again. He again asks what's wrong, and she replies, "I've never been kissed before." The man again complies with her wishes and gives her a romantic kiss. She starts crying again, and the man, slightly irritated, asks what's her problem. "I've never been fucked before" she says. So he picks her up and throws her in the ocean and says, "There, now you're fucked."
Vote: has 79.04 % from 413 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, romantic, sex, vulgar, women
There was three guys a sex addict a weed addict and a alcoholic they all went to hell for their sin and was standing in front of the devil. The devil made a deal with them saying I will lock you in a room with what ever you did for a 1000 years and if you get over any of your sins I will send you back to the land of the living, Earth. So the sex addict got locked in a room full of virgins, the alcohol addict got locked in a room full of beer, the weed addict locked in a room full of weed. 1000 years later the Devil goes to the sex addict he comes out saying "Aww my dick hurts I'm never having sex again", poof back to earth. Open the alcoholic room and he say "Im never having beer", and gets sent back to Earth. Then the Devil opens the weed addicts room and the Weed addict punches the Devil in the face and says "you forgot my lighter bitch!"
Vote: has 78.92 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, sex, time, vulgar, weed
Kissing is a habit Fucking is a game Guys get all the pleasure Girls get all the pain The guy says I love you You believe its true But when your tummy starts to swell, He says 'to hell with you' 10 minutes of pleasure 9 months in pain 3 days in hospital A baby without a name The baby is a bastard The mother is a whore This never wouldn't have happened If the rubber wouldn't have torn
Vote: has 71.40 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, love, poems, sex, vulgar
AT WORK, Michael: Why you white guys always so happy? Casey: Because I make love to my wife every morning before work. Michael: Say whaaat? You get her to make love EVERY morning? How do you do that? Casey: It's easy, I just say a poem, women love poems and will fall for them all the time. Michael: Ok, what kind of poem can you say to make her make love every morning? Casey: I say, "blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes of blue, I love to wake up and make love to you. Michael: HAHAAA she falls for that? Casey: yes you should try it. NEXT DAY TYRONE COMES IN WITH BLACK EYE FAT LIP AND A TOOTH MISSING. Casey: What happened to you? Michael: Well, I said a poem to my wife and she didn't like it. Casey: She didn't like it? What did you say? Michael: Nappy head, nappy head, eyes like a frog, if I could roll your fat ass over I would do you like a dog.
Vote: has 70.72 % from 73 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, poems, sex, white people
Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
Vote: has 70.02 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food, poems, sex, time
Sex is bad Sex is a sin Sins are forgiven So stick it in.
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: poems, religious, sex
Yo mama so short when she smokes weed, she cant even get high.
Vote: has 59.23 % from 65 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, vulgar, weed, Yo mama
There are three moms. A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I cannot believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse. I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"
Vote: has 58.58 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, sex, stupid, weed
Sex is when a guys communication, enters a girls information, to increase the population, for a younger generation, do you get the information... or do you need a demonstration.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, men, poems, sex, women
Yo mama's so fat when she is having sex, her partner doesen't know if it's in her butt or her boobs.
Vote: has 56.84 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, sex, vulgar, Yo mama