Joke #121

How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.
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has 16.86 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: cop, light bulb

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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.
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Microsoft Office doesn't correct Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris correct Microsoft Office.
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Q. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? A1. "What's a light bulb?" A2. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her. A3. Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!"
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Q: What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? A: You can unscrew a light bulb.
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The following is supposedly a true story relating a situation that actually occurred in Los Angeles. The Marines were backing-up LAPD on a call that someone had broken into a store. At the scene, the cop told the Marines to "cover" him as he approached the store (to police, "cover" means to point your weapons in the direction of the threat, to Marines it means to lay down a base of fire!). The Marines promptly laid down a base of the fire. The Marines fired 178 rounds before they stopped shooting. The thief, probably a little scared at this point, called 911 and reported, "They're shooting at me!"
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has 81.65 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: communication, cop, geography, military
Johny was stopped by the policeman on the road, the policeman has looked over the whole car and has said to Johny: "Johny, if you´ll go somebody by your car, the human would probably survive the collision with your car also without your help, but the treatment with the content of your archaic first aid box will survive nobody, there´s no doubt. Did you buy it in the shop B.C.?"
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has 28.82 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, little Johnny, time
The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Gomer - who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket went in to try out for the job. "Okay," the sheriff drawled, "Gomer, what is 1 and 1?" "11" he replied. The sheriff thought to himself, "That's not what I meant, but he's right." "What two days of the week start with the letter 'T'?" "Today and tomorrow." He was again surprised that Gomer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself. "Now Gomer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?" Gomer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don't know." "Well, why don't you go home and work on that one for a while?" So, Gomer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Gomer was exultant. "It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!"
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How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One...men will screw anything.
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