Joke #12210

Q: What did the fire monster that was slayed by the water monster say? A: "You're cold."
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: communication

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The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About half held up their hands. Not satisfied he harangued for another twenty minutes and repeated his question. This time he received a response of about 80 percent. Still unsatisfied, he lectured for another 15 minutes and repeated his question. With all thoughts now on Sunday dinner, all responded except one elderly lady in the rear. "Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" "I don't have any." "Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?" "Ninety three." "Mrs. Jones, please come down in front and tell the congregation how a person can live to be ninety-three, and not have an enemy in the world." The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, very slowly turned around and said: "It's easy, I just outlived the bitches."
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has 82.12 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: age, church, communication, time, vulgar
Man walks into a bar and sits next to another customer. Bartender comes over and says to the new customer, "what can I get you?" Customer says "bourbon and coke." Bartender looks at first customer and says another "beer Jackass?" He says nods his head yes. 10 minutes later bartender comes back to check to see if customer wants another bourbon and coke and customer says "sure." Bartender looks at first customer and says "another beer Jackass?" And customer nods yes. Bourbon and coke customer says to beer customer, "Man you are the customer, don't le t that bartender talk to you like that." Beer customer says "it's ok he al, he al, He always calls me that!"
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, communication, customer service, vulgar
A really bad impressionist walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the wrong face?"
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: bar, beauty, communication
Yo mama's so stupid when she cries for help she says "come here please".
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, stupid, Yo mama
Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
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has 66.49 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: communication, fart, marriage, mean, sex
Q: What do you call a pig who knows karate? A: Pork Chop.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, sport
While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train set. "If you get your train," I told him, "your dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?" The boy became very quiet. So, moving the conversation along, I asked, "What else would you like Santa to bring you?" He promptly replied, "Another train."
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, communication, kids, work
My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry. So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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has 63.61 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, friendship, mean
Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition of each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes? A: Doyouthinkysaraus.
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has 50.29 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: communication, dinosaur