Joke #12336

Q: What's the difference between a book and a teacher? A: You can shut a book up but you can't shut a teacher up.
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has 67.78 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: teacher, vulgar

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During a lesson little Johnny yawns extremely wide. Teacher tries to make a joke: "Johnny, don't swallow me." He replies: "Don't worry, teacher, I don't eat pork."
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has 82.40 % from 363 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
Little Johnny was heard by his mother reciting his homework: "Two plus two, the son of a bitch is four; four plus four, the son of a bitch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a bitch!" Johnny shouted his mother "Watch your language! You're not allowed to use the swearwords." But, Mom, replied the boy, "That's what the teacher taught us, and she said to recite it out loud till we learned it." Next day Johnny's mother went right into the classroom to complain. "Oh, heavens" said the teacher. "That's not what I taught them. They're supposed to say, 'Two plus two, the sum of which is four."
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has 73.28 % from 191 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math, teacher, vulgar
One day the teacher was asking the class about there weekends. She asked sue, "how was your weekend?" "Good." Then little Johnny waved his hand "me, me, me." Finally giving in said, "what did you do this weekend?" "I rode in my wagon pulled by my dog and hit a steep hill. The wagon started going faster than the dog and the handle went up his ass." "Rectum is the word you're looking for," she says. "Rectum," said Johnny, "da man near killed him."
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: communication, dog, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
Little Johnny: "I've piss may I go out?" Teacher : "Piss is an impolite word instead you say I've number 1." Jimmy: "May I go out? I want to shit." Teacher: "Shit is also a bad word it is better to use number 2 instead." Ronald: "There is a wind in my belly give me please a number for it."
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has 64.66 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, kids, teacher, vulgar
Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: For fingering a minor.
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has 64.59 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: music, prison, teacher, vulgar
Teacher: "Who can tell a story?" Little Johnny: "Our maid's ass." Teacher: "Why?" Little Johnny: "Last night daddy touched her ass and was whispering: 'A wonderful story.'"
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has 62.82 % from 185 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar
The teacher asks a student "If you have $5 and billy takes $3, how much do you have left?" The student replies "Not enough for fucking lunch and billy ain't gonna have no got damn teeth left stealing my 3 dollars."
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: math, money, student, teacher, vulgar
Two men were talking: First : "Can U put the word 'penis' in a sentence?" Second: "Yo mama's pussy."
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has 53.88 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
A mom calls out to her son "Harry! Wake up! You'll be late for school." The son replies, "Mom I don't want to go to school! The teachers and students hate me! Give me one reason I should go!" The mom says back, "You should go because you're the principal!"
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has 78.79 % from 367 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher
Kissing is a habit Fucking is a game Guys get all the pleasure Girls get all the pain The guy says I love you You believe its true But when your tummy starts to swell, He says 'to hell with you' 10 minutes of pleasure 9 months in pain 3 days in hospital A baby without a name The baby is a bastard The mother is a whore This never wouldn't have happened If the rubber wouldn't have torn
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has 68.80 % from 350 votes. More jokes about: kids, love, poems, sex, vulgar