Joke #124

Man comes home from work to find his boyfriend whacking off into a condom. Man says, "WTF?" Boyfriend says, "I am making you a sack lunch!"

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? They already have boyfriends.

If you need to break up with somebody, the best place to do so is McDonalds. There are no plates or glasses to be broken over your head, no sharp knives or spiky forks, plus you can always hide behind a fat kid.

Son: Dad, what does 'gay' means? Father: It means 'to be happy'. Son: Are you gay? Father: No, son. I have a wife.

My girlfriend is like February 30th, she doesn't exist.

I've asked my girlfriend to polish my medieval battle uniform while I go to the pub. She always said she wanted a night in, shining armour.

Q: Why did the gay man get fired from his job at the sperm bank? A: Drinking on the job.

Q:What does one gay say to another homo sitting at the bar? A:"Do you mind if I push in your stool?"

I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".

Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."

How do men define a "50/50" relationship? We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.