Joke #12569

Your nails are so long when you come around the corner the police arrested you for dangerous weapons.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: cop, insulting

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Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, "Did Santa get you that?" "Yes," replies the little girl. "Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!" and fines her $5. The little girl looks up at the cop and says, "Nice horse you've got there, did Santa bring you that?" The cop chuckles and replies, "He sure did!" "Well," says the little girl, "Next year tell Santa that the dick goes under the horse, not on top of it!"
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has 85.37 % from 2459 votes. More jokes about: cop, horse, insulting, money, Santa
Cop on horse says to little girl on bike, "Did Santa get you that?" "Yes," replies the little girl. "Well tell him to put a reflector light on it next year!" and fines her $5. The little girl looks up at the cop and says, "Nice horse you've got there, did Santa bring you that?" The cop chuckles and replies, "He sure did!" "Well," says the little girl, "Next year tell Santa that the d*ck goes under the horse, not on top of it!"
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has 84.17 % from 2311 votes. More jokes about: cop, horse, insulting, money, Santa
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she called the police to report a suspicious looking person lurking in her mirror.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: cop, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
Officer: "I'm arresting you for downloading all of Wikipedia." Man: "No wait! I can explain everything!"
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has 57.52 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: cop, IT
Yo momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car!
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has 71.61 % from 291 votes. More jokes about: car, insulting, stupid, Yo mama
A policeman is driving along the road when he gets an urgent message on his radio telling him there has been a dead body found in an ice cream van just down the road. He rushes to the scene where he discovers a man's body, with chocolate flakes up each nostril, raspberry sauce all over his head and he is covered from head to toe in hundreds of thousands of sprinkles. A puzzled onlooker asks the policeman what he thinks has happened, to which the policeman replies: "It looks like he's topped himself."
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: cop
Roses are red "just like blood" Violets are blue "just like when I stab your face and shuve it in poo" So have you lurned that when I stab you blood comes out And shows me 1 thing your shit.
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has 14.73 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: insulting, poems, vulgar
YO momma is so old, I slit her throat and dust came out!
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has 43.21 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: age, insulting, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so stupid, it took her an hour to cook instant rice.
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has 36.90 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, stupid, time, Yo mama
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?" He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started Writing another ticket for having worn tires. So my wife called him a ****-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote. Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.
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has 78.31 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: cop, old people, travel, wife, work