Joke #12602

Patient: "Doctor, I'm starting to forget things." Doctor: "I understand." Patient: "Understand what?"

A 64-year-old lady never had any kids, so she went to her doctor and asked if he would help her with in-vitro fertilization. He said, "You're a little old, but I guess we could give it a try." A few months later she got pregnant. She invited her girlfriends over to see the baby, and they all very anxious to see the baby boy. The newly mother said, "why don't we just talk awhile." As time went on, her friends asked again and again where is the baby... She said, "We never get a chance to talk, and here is our chance to catch up!" Finally they insisted on seeing him. She said, "Well, we'll just have to wait until he cries before you all can see him." The women were puzzled. And she said, "I don't remember where I put him."

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.

Doctor: "Did you take those pills I gave you to improve your memory?" Patient: "What pills?"

Patient to friend: "I saw the doctor to day about my loss of memory." Friend: "What did he do?" Patient: "He made me pay him in advance."

Doctor (to an absent-minded patient): "What is wrong with you?" Patient: "I am losing my memory. Please prescribe some medicine." Doctor (Handing him the prescription after a while): "Here, Take this." Patient: "Why are you giving me this prescription? I am perfectly all right."

Johny visits the psychiatrist and tells him: "Lately I have a big problem with my memory." The psychiatrist asks Johny: "And how does it demonstrate concretely?" Johny: "What?"

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A: I forget. Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

There are three men on a desert island: Genius, Smart, and Idiot. Genius has concluded that at least one man must swim to shore and get help. Genius volunteered himself, as he is the most likely to get remember to get help. Genius, not being very athletic, swam halfway to safety and then drowned. Days later, Smart finally realized Genius drowned. Smart then decided it was his turn to swim and get help. Idiot agreed because he didn't know what was happening. Smart, not being very athletic, swam three quarte rs of the way to safety and drowned. Days later, Idiot decided it must his turn to swim. He also did not know what his goal was. Idiot, not having very much intelligence, swam halfway to safety, felt tired, so he swam back to the island he was stranded on.

The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks." "And did he?" "Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill."

A woman took her dog to the vet. She said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move. "Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor. "How much do I owe you?" the lady asks. "$345," says the doctor. "$345!!?" the lady asks. "Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."