Joke #1350

What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.
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has 53.56 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: sex

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Women need a reason to have sex - men just need a place.
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has 68.50 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, sex, women
Kissing is a habit Fucking is a game Guys get all the pleasure Girls get all the pain The guy says I love you You believe its true But when your tummy starts to swell, He says 'to hell with you' 10 minutes of pleasure 9 months in pain 3 days in hospital A baby without a name The baby is a bastard The mother is a whore This never wouldn't have happened If the rubber wouldn't have torn
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has 68.53 % from 289 votes. More jokes about: kids, love, poems, sex, vulgar
A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. "Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks. "No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
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has 65.47 % from 426 votes. More jokes about: sex, ugly
Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
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has 69.06 % from 171 votes. More jokes about: sex
Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
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has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, fat, sex, Yo mama
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together? A: In case you miss.
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has 67.47 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: sex, women
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning? Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
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has 41.14 % from 178 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, drunk, morbid, sex
Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office. But she belonged to someone else... One day, Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said, "I'll give you a Ł100 if you let me have sex with you." But the girl said, "NO." Johnny said, "I'll be fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, and I'll be finished by the time you pick it up." She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend... So she called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend says, "Ask him for Ł200, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get his pants down." So she agrees and accepts the proposal. Half an hour goes by, and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call. Finally, after 45 minutes, the boyfriend calls and asks what happened. She responded, "The bastard used coins!"
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has 67.27 % from 178 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man who recently had a sex-change operation was talking to his former buddies at work about the operation. "Was it painful?" someone asked. "Well,"she said. "There was one part that was extremely painful." "I bet I know what part was so painful," someone else said. "I bet it was when they cut off your balls," they said. "No," she said. "I was heavily sedated and didn't feel a thing." "Then it must have been when they cut off your pecker," another person offered. "No," she said. "I was sedated then too, and didn't feel anything." "Then what part of the operation was so painful?" They wanted to know. "Well," she said. "After they were done cutting, they stuck a straw in my ear and sucked out half of my brains."
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has 39.04 % from 135 votes. More jokes about: doctor, sex, work
Q: What does a blond man do at 03.00 in the night naked at the balcony? A: The blond girl told him to come outside
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has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde, sex, time