Joke #1362

Q: Why do fish live in to the salt water? A: For the reason that pepper makes them sneeze!
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has 15.98 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish

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After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license. The fisherman says to the warden, "I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Everyday I come done to the water and whistle and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day." The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "If you don't believe me then watch," as he throws the lobsters back into the water. The warden says, "Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water." The fisherman turns to the warden and says, "What lobsters?"
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has 73.06 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop, dirty, fish
What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam.
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
One day, a guy decides to go ice fishing. He gets out onto the ice and starts making a hole with his ice augur. Suddenly he hears a booming voice say "there's no fish there!" He looks around startled but doesn't see anyone. He packs up and moves to another spot and starts working on a new hole. Again he hears the booming voice "there's no fish there!" He moves again and starts making a new hole and hears the voice again. "There's no fish there!" it booms. He looks up nervously. "G-G-God? I-I-Is that... you?" he asks. "No, it's the arena manager. Get the fuck out of here!"
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has 71.43 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, god, management, vulgar
Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked: "What are you up to there, Nancy?" "My goldfish died", replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned: "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied: "That's because he's inside your fucking cat."
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has 71.23 % from 173 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, death, fish, little Johnny
I once had a goldfish that could break-dance on a carpet, but only for like 20 seconds.
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has 69.36 % from 230 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, time
If they bring shrimp home on shrimp boats, fish home on fish boats, and clams home on clam boats, what do they bring crabs home on? The Captains Dinghy!
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, life
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing? A harenet.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
Piranhas in the aquarium: sink your finger, lose your finger-game!
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, fish, game
Q: Why didn't go Noah fishing? A: He only had two worms.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, bible, fish
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says: "Dam"
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish