Joke #1699

"Mommy, all the kids at school say I'm a werewolf! Is that true?" "No, of course not. Now shut up and comb your face."
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has 45.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, school

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Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. The teacher tells the principal that she has had it with his exaggerations. The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. He will tell Johnny a lie so big that he will never tell another one. Ever. The next day, Johnny shows up two hours late. Johnny says, "I was two hours early today so I had time to fish in the pond on my way to school. I caught a 17-pound trout and had to take it home. If I didn't clean it and freeze it, my mom would've been angry. That's why I'm so late". The teacher promptly takes him to the principal's office and explains the story to the principal. The principal tells Johnny about his own trip to school that day. He says, "I was walking to school through the park on the trail today when I heard something behind me. I turned around and was shocked to see a giant grizzly bear behind me. He was 24 feet tall and had 6-inch fangs. He was going to eat me, Johnny! Just then a little dog ran out from the bushes, jumped up and attacked the bear. The little dog killed the bear and then ate the whole bear right there in front of me. What do you think of that, Johnny?" Johnny replies, "Oh yeah, that's my dog Sparky. That's his third bear this week."
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has 84.07 % from 837 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, little Johnny, school
Teacher: If a lion is chasing you, what would you do? Christy: I'd climb a tree. Teacher: if the lion climbs a tree? Christy: I will jump in the lake and swim. Teacher: if the lion also jumps in the water and swims after you? Christy: Teacher, are you on my side or on the lion's?
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has 80.87 % from 258 votes. More jokes about: animal, school, teacher
A lonely frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him: "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." The frog is thrilled, "This is great! "Will I meet her at a party?" he croaks. "No," says the psychic, "in biology class."
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has 74.43 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, beauty, phone, school, science
Q: What do dogs do after they finish obedience school? A: They get their masters.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, school
Teacher: Students, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing? Class: "Brotherly love."
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has 65.25 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: animal, love, school, teacher
What's a moo hoo for grazing school? Grass class.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, school
What's a skunk's favourite game in school? Show and smell.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, game, school
Q: What is a snake's favorite subject in school? A: Hissssstory.
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, history, school
Teacher: Billy, how do you spell "Crocodile"? Billy: ‘K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' Teacher: No, that's wrong Billy: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, school, teacher
The teacher said to Danny: "Why are you in the floor?" Danny said: "Because you said to do this Math problem without Tables."
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has 75.29 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: school