Joke #197

Q: How does a man show he is planning for the future? A: He buys two cases of beer.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: beer, men

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HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN Arrive naked... with beer.
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has 84.85 % from 1141 votes. More jokes about: beer, love, men, romantic, women
A man in a pub asks for a beer. The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar." "One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?" "Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars." "Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."
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has 84.46 % from 180 votes. More jokes about: bar, beer, men, money, wife
How to Impress a Woman: compliment her, kiss her, caress her, love her, comfort her, protect her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, listen to her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. How to Impress a Man: show up naked, bring beer.
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has 65.42 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: beer, love, men, romantic, women
A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Hunting flies," He responded. "Oh, killing any?" She asked. "Yep, three males, two females," he replied. Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell? He responded, "Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone."
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, beer, men, phone, women
A real man would never cry in public unless: He watched a movie in which a heroic dog dies to save his master. Or if Heidi klum unbuckled her shirt. Or if he accidentally dropped crates full of beer.
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: beer, celebrity, dog, men
Yesterday, government scientists suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.
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has 59.51 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: beer, men, political, science, women
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?" "Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?" The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
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has 58.28 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: bar, beer, car, men, sex
What is a "successful hunting trip"? When three men kill 9 cases of Budweiser in two days
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has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: beer, hunting, men
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
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has 36.08 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: beer, men, women
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: beer, men