A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary.
So he decides to buy her a cell phone.
She is all excited - she loves her phone.
He shows her and explains to her all the features on the phone.
The next day the blonde goes shopping. Her phone rings and it's her husband.
"Hi Hon," he says.
"How do you like your new phone?"
She replies, "I just love it.
It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell.
There's one thing I don't understand though."
"What's that, baby?" asks the husband.
"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"
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Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
Q: What was the blonde psychic's greatest achievment?
A: An IN-body experience!
A blonde working in the coffin industry was thinking of various ways to improve her business.
She thought perhaps a good way to do it would be to emulate the success of the fashion store across the street which had done very well with it's new "Buy 1, Get 1 Free" deal.
Soon, a man walks in.
"I would like a coffin for my father. But these coffins are very expensive!"
"Well, sir, you'll be happy to know we have a 'Buy 1, Get 1 Free' deal!"
The customer left.
A blonde walks into a doctor’s office and says, “Doc, I’m horribly sick!”
The doctor looks at her and asks, “Flu?”
“No, I drove here.”
Q: Why did the blonde climb on to the roof?
A: Someone told her the drinks were on the house.
There's a double Decker bus driving down the street full of passengers, blonde and brunette.
On the lower level of the bus, the brunettes are having a good time, talking, laughing, and singing along to the music playing.
On the upper part of the bus, the blondes are seated... they're in a panic.
They're screaming, terrified, and holding onto each other as the bus moves along the street.
Finally, a brunette gets up and walks to the top of the bus to ask what's wrong, and one of the blonde's replies, "what's wrong?!? Well, you'd be screaming too if you didn't have a driver!!!"
A guy's walking along the beach and he finds a magic lamp.
He rubs it and two blonde genies come out.
They tell him they'll grant him any three wishes he wants.
So he makes his wishes...
he wakes up in bed with 50 of the most beautiful women he's ever seen and he'd just made love to all of them.
Then he walks outta the bed and opens a treasure chest filled with more money than you could ever imagine...
then two KKK members come riding in on horses, throw a noose over a tree and hang him...
The KKK members take off their masks and its the two blonde genies one of them says to the other:
"I can understand why he wanted to sleep with all the women, I know why he wanted a chest full of money...
but I can't figure out why the hell he would wanna be hung like a nigger..."
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature."
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
Q: What do blondes eat to increase their breast size?
A: Silicone chips.