What do dogs and women have in common?
They both like 12-inch bones.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
A Boyfriend texts his Girlfriend saying "Hey babe you wanna come over and have sex?"
Girlfriend texts back "Duh!"
So the girl goes over her Boyfriends house, and right before they get into it, he sets the boundaries.
"Ok, so my little brother is home, and I have bunk beds. He's on the bottom bunk.
If you want it harder, you say tomato.
If you want it faster, you say lettuce, and if you want to moan you say any other ingredients that would be on a sandwich."
So they're up on the top bunk having sex, and she's yelling "Tomato! Tomato! Lettuce! Lettuce! Cheese! Cheese!"
Well the little brother is still on the bottom bunk and yells "Hey can you guys knock it off, your getting Mayonnaise all over me!!!"
Q: Why are black peoples nostrils so big?
A: Because that's what God held them by when he was painting them.
I don't know whats happening in this country.
You've got school children dressing like whores and whores dressing like school children.
Its a nightmare... you just don't know whether to carry sweets or money!
Q: How do you cancel an appointment at a sperm bank?
A: Tell them you can't cum.
Vote:
Today in lesson Little Jonny went to the back of the room and Miss McRacen went "Not in the back."
Jonny: "That's what she said."
Miss: "Get out!"
Jonny "She said that too."
Vote:
Boy: "Do you like parties?"
Girl: "Yes, why?"
Boy: "Well then jump in my pants and have a ball!"
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
Vote:
Q: What’s an orgasm, Mom?
A: I don’t know… ask your father.
Q: Why would a blonde wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means Stop.