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Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn't wave back...
So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow.
Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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Cartoonist found dead in home.
Details are sketchy.
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us.
The only difference is, then he kills people.
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You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts...
Man, and do you have life?
OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
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Q: Why are politicians like diapers?
A: Both should be changed regularly and for the same reason.
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.
Who was the fastest runner?
Adam.
He was first in the human race.
Man: You've brought religion into my life.
Woman: Really? How?
Man: Until I met you, I didn't believe in Hell.
Two entrepreneurs, Jack and John, decided to start a bungee-jumping business south of the border.
They went to Casa del Sol, Mexico, built a huge platform, and opened for business.
By noon the first day, they both noticed that while everyone was watching, no one was buying tickets.
Jack told John to go up and jump, so everyone could see how much fun it was, and then they would buy tickets and try it.
John jumped, almost reached the ground, and sprang back up.
Jack saw that his shirt was torn and his hair was mussed.
John came down again and sprang back up.
This time he had several bruises and his clothes were ripped to shreds.
The third time down and back up, and he had several open wounds, a broken arm, and was bruised over most of his body.
Jack quickly raised John to the platform and asked him what in the world was going on.
John replied, "I’m not sure. Do you know what 'pinata' means?"