Joke #5589

A boy speeding on road. Guard stops him and ask, "Did you see the speed limit sign?" The boy says, "Yea, I just didnt see you."
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has 75.77 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: cop

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A turtle is crossing the road when he's mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, "I don't know. It all happened so fast."
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has 68.56 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, cop
A police officer pulled a young woman over for speeding and politely asked to see her license. "Why don't you cops get your act together," she said in a huff. "Yesterday you take my license away, and now today you expect me to show it to you!"
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has 78.55 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: cop
The murderer was holed up in his house, and the SWAT team was trying to get him out. A cop got on the bullhorn and said, "Come on out, or I'm going to come in there and drag you out!" The murderer called back, "I'm warning you. If you don't wipe your feet when you come in, my wife'll kill us both!"
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has 72.45 % from 229 votes. More jokes about: cop, wife
Me: Can I call an officer a pussy? Cop: No. Me: Can I call a pussy 'officer?' Cop: I guess you could... Me: Goodnight, officer
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has 81.14 % from 546 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty
The Judge said to the defendant. "I thought I told you I never wanted to see you in here again." "Your Honor," the criminal said, "that's what I tried to tell the police, but they wouldn't listen."
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has 81.85 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: cop
How many cop jokes are there? Just two, all the rest are true!
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
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has 53.62 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, kids
Did you hear about the cannibal who joined the police force? He said he wanted to grill his suspects.
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has 69.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: black humor, cop
A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie’s house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park…and couldn’t find his way home. ” Oy Morris “, said grandma, ” You’ve been going to that park for over 30 years ! So how could you get lost ? ” Leaning close to grandma, so that the policeman couldn’t hear. Morris whispered, ” I wasn’t lost…..I was just too tired to walk home.”
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has 17.80 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, old people
A female police officer pulls over a drunk driver Officer: "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do can and will be held against you in the court of law." Driver: "Tits"
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has 79.72 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: cop