Joke #5611

One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, "Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No", said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, "Then you're not old enough." The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, "Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No" said Little Johhny. "Then you're not old enough." his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, "Can I have some of your cookies?" Little Johnny replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" His grandpa replied, "It most certainly can!" Little Johnny replied, "Then go fuck yourself.
Vote:
has 85.91 % from 2606 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

"Little Johnny, why does your little sister cry?" "Because I helped her."  "But that is a good thing! What did you help her with?" "I helped her eat her gummy bears."
Vote:
has 71.58 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: food, kids, little Johnny
The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees. She explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later, the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest. Little Johnny — at the back of the class — put his hand up and asks the teacher, "Are you sure about the stork, miss? I think you’re getting your birds mixed up.My big sister just got a little baby and she said it came from a black pecker at the beach!"
Vote:
has 82.63 % from 259 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Little Johnny's class were on an outing to their local police station where they saw pictures, of the ten most wanted men, tacked to a bulletin board. On the way out of the police station Little Johnny said to the officer, "It was so nice of you to put my daddy's picture up there."
Vote:
has 79.14 % from 236 votes. More jokes about: cop, dad, little Johnny
Johnny Walks in his parents room finding his dad with his dick in his mom's pussy. Johnny asks his dad " Can realatives Have babies if they fuck?" "Of course not johnny" his dad replied. the very next day johnny was his room stuffing his dick in his 14 year old's pussy and humping her. "ohhhhh Johnny! Fuck Me Harder!" his sister yelled. I am! johnny said. then his sister gave johnny a blowjob to make his dick bigger. "Now I Can Fuck Better!" said Little Johnny. Then Johnny Fucked His Sister How He Saw His Dad Doing To His Mom. Then his parents came into his room and his mom saw his huge cock and said "Johnny That Sure Is Big! "Well Your Next Mom!" Johnny replied
Vote:
has 41.76 % from 363 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Little Johnny was in Maths class when his teacher asked him: "Johnny, if your Mother had to repay a loan of $100,000, and you gave her $50,000, what would she need to repay the loan?" Johnny replied, "To repay the loan? $50,000 more. To stay alive? CPR."
Vote:
has 52.63 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: black humor, little Johnny, math, money, vulgar
Little Johnny returns from school and says: "Mam, in school we write dirty swear-words so often!" "But I hope you are not writing them, my son." "No, I'm dictating them!"
Vote:
has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: family, little Johnny, school
Little Johnny asks his father for a $200 bicycle for his birthday. Johnny's father says, "We have an $80,000 mortgage on the house, and I just got laid off! There won't be a $200 bike this year." Two days later, Little Johnny walks out of the house with all his belongings in a suitcase. His father asks him why he's leaving. Johnny says, "Early this morning, I was walking past your room, and I heard you tell Mommy that you were pulling out, and Mommy said that you should wait because she was coming too, and I'll be damned if I'll get stuck with an $80,000 mortgage!"
Vote:
has 65.42 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
Teacher: How old is your father? Johnny: As old as I am. Teacher: How is it possible? Little Johnny: He became father only after I was born.
Vote:
has 78.59 % from 261 votes. More jokes about: age, little Johnny, teacher
Teaching an English lesson, the teacher wrote on the board, fully aware of the grammar errors: "I ain't had no fun in months" "Now, how should I correct this sentence." "Get a new boyfriend," said Little Johnny.
Vote:
has 65.10 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny
One day the teacher was asking the class about there weekends. She asked sue, "how was your weekend?" "Good." Then little Johnny waved his hand "me, me, me." Finally giving in said, "what did you do this weekend?" "I rode in my wagon pulled by my dog and hit a steep hill. The wagon started going faster than the dog and the handle went up his ass." "Rectum is the word you're looking for," she says. "Rectum," said Johnny, "da man near killed him."
Vote:
has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: communication, dog, little Johnny, teacher, vulgar